While the idea of a one-man/one-wife marriage makes better sense, it's not uncommon to find an adult woman without a guy. Its the only accepted form of polygamy. Most people search for more excitement outside their marriage since adultery isn't a legal or an open option. Older women (usually post-30s), divorcees (or widows), Asalamu aleykum Shaykh, most parents, especially in the west, would never allow their daughters to be a second wife. Now, a setting with more than one wife, and perhaps, many children will naturally be prone to more arguments or discords. 11 Tips for Dating a Blind Person, Challenges and Dating Websites, Do Emotionally Unavailable Men Change? thanks for that. Position One: Islam restricts or forbids polygyny. Polygamy promotes jealousy within families. The Prophet Sulaymaan (Solomon) and other Prophets had numerous wives as is known (in both Biblical and Quranic scripture)*. No lady loves the idea of another female coming to invade her space or share her lover. People marry for companionship, start a family, financial support, pressure from parents, etc. It is unfortunate that promiscuoussexual behaviour andinfidelity havebecome normal practices in many societies whilst plural Islamic marriage for men is outlawed, seen as barbaric and demeaning to women. The pros and cons of polygamy are numerous. Whatever is below the ankles from the garment will be in the Fire. And the response to the man who says, But I dont wear long trousers out of pride just like Abu Bakr., Chapter 2: Kitb At-Tawheed. There's no subtle way to put it in this pros and cons article; most women in polygamous relationships or families are only doing a great job hiding how they truly feel. Older women (usually post-30s), divorcees (or widows) [read on], In the name of Allah, Most Merciful, Bestower of Mercy. Therefore, a case of one or more spouses engaging in sex outside a polygamy arrangement can infect everyone in the marriage with STDs. It is perhaps telling that polygamy is practiced in almost all of the 20 most unstable countries on the Fragile States Index. Third theme: The coping strategies used by polygamous women have included faith in religion, fate role, and compromise In such a scenario, the legally married wife usually wants to claim the lion's share for her and her children while the other wives will want an equal split. Advantages (Merits) of Polygamy 1. In fact, many people in a monogamous relationship cheat on their partners since they are just quite fed up with him or her and want to experience new things. 3. Yes, women can choose to get pregnant by any "John Doe" or approach a sperm bank if shes unlucky with finding a man to start a family with. Brideprice is often paid in cows, leading some young men to resort to cattle raids and other forms of crime. Recommended: Countries that produces the best music in the world. I. on The Excellence of Makkah, its History and its Sacredness (The Masjid al-Harm). Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. Since the guy has other spouses, the idea of splitting half of what he owns with one of the spouses that wish to leave cannot even be on the table. Furthermore, even if the husband isn't extremely wealthy, just as two is better than one, three or more financially stable people in a marriage setting will undoubtedly translate to financial security for the entire family. Reduce cheating in marriage: Having more than one partner can reduce the rate of cheating. 2 They were from nations about which the Lord had told the Israelites, You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods. Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love. The Creed of Abul-Hasan Al-Ashari: Al-Ibnah an Usl Ad-Diynah: [8] The Mutazilahand the Arguments of the Kullbiyyah, Mturdiyyah and Ashariyyahand how the Salaf and Ibn Taymiyyah Exposed their Deviations in the Names and Attributes of Allh. It helps maintain ties between families. Neel Burton, M.D., is a psychiatrist, philosopher, and writer who lives and teaches in Oxford, England. As a woman, you need to know that it's a win-win situation for a man that has many wives at his disposal. 6 So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord; he did not follow the Lord completely, as David his father had done. If you are looking at the pros and cons of polygamy for yourself or a friend, remember kids are fragile, and polygamy isn't as common as monogamy anymore. As the Quran indicates (4:3), the issue of polygamy in Islam is understood in the light of community obligations towards orphans and widows. And if you (pl) fear you cannot be just towards the orphans, then marry the women you liketwo or three or fourbut if you fear you will not be equitable, then(only) one1 or(consider) those whom you rightfully possess.. Polygamy is the concept that people can be married to more than one partner. Some spouses may be treated quite poorly, 25. Also see: Roles of Children in the family. As our time is dominated by the overwhelming influence of science, here are some scientific facts that show the consequences of promiscuity: Prophet Muhammad PBUH clarifies the outcome of immorality appearance in societies saying: Immorality never appears among a people to such an extent that they commit it openly, but plagues and diseases that were never known among the predecessors will spread among them.. Islam, Muslim have been given permission to many more them one women. Edeh Samuel Chukwuemeka ACMC, is a Law Student and a Certified Mediator/Conciliator in Nigeria. Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. 5 Tips to Break the Cycle, 29 Tell-All Signs a Sensitive Guy Likes You (What You Want to Know), 7. But there is only one condition: the husband is totally responsible for all his wives. The Fund for Peace; DHS; MICS. It was the sugar and the refined carbohydrates! While the pros can make it initially attractive for men and women alike, the disadvantages and the nature of humans will likely make it unsustainable. 4 Reasons Why Ramadan Is A Point Of Change, What is Ramadan? So, if you are wondering what polygamy feels like, perhaps you are considering the idea of being the new wife to an already married man, or your husband is making new marriage plans with another woman. In some circumstances, a man may take on additional wives if he is financially capable of supporting them and treating them all equally. Polygamy in Islam Conditions and Advantages Unhappiness, loneliness, sense of competition and jealousy, and lack of intimacy with the spouse were identified as disadvantages of polygyny. The former is when a woman marries more than one guy, while the latter is a marital arrangement, where four or more adults are sexually and romantically involved with each other. A big family has its advantages. If polygynous unions are common, the resulting shortage of brides inflates the brideprice, raising the age at which young men can afford to marry while incentivizing families to hive off their daughters at the soonest opportunity, even at the cost of interrupting their education. Polygamy is a breeding ground for jealousy, 21. After all, there's another wife under the same roof to satisfy his urges. Just as many cultural practices, polygamy promotes and exhibits cultures of a location or area. So the Christian has only one wife. Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah (nation, Muslim community). Indeed, Marriage is a sacred institution in Islam with very important objectives. Those whospeak ill of plural marriages (polygyny) are affected by the modern day Christian ideology (which itself is not the way of the Prophets as mentioned in biblical scriptures). The presence of a rival alone is enough reason for a fight. Islam Marriage. The principles of Islam have also been framed in such a way that man can comply And whoever is ungrateful then indeed, my Lord is Free of need and Generous. Quraan 27:40, And to Dawud, We gave Sulaiman (for a son). Below are some of the advantages of polygamy to the husband, wife, and society: Sexual satisfaction. 9 Celia Milton Owner/lead Officiant (2006-present) Author has 43.2K answers and 73.3M answer views 10 mo Related What are two main reasons that make you oppose polygamy? Many men die in battles, wars and natural disasters many, many numbers of men pass away in this manner. It can become so convenient that one wife can rest from all chores in a particular week and resume subsequent weeks. Naturally, humans are a variety-loving species, which makes cheating on our spouses an easy option as continuous monotony is a problem for us. Bigger selection of partners. Getting bored: Another advantage of polygamous marriage is that there will be lower risk of people getting bored in their marriage after the whole wedding and maybe child bearing couples tend to get bored in the marriage. Therefore, it's not uncommon for arguments to erupt when a man isn't getting enough intimate time with his wife. In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of polygamous marriages? the time he stays and the money he spends. Being in a polygamous marriage can help ease the pressure of doing all the chores alone. This chapter begins with as melancholy a but as almost any we find in all the Bible. What's interesting is that the wives of such alpha males are also placed on the same pedestal society places their husbands, so both husbands and wives sometimes enjoy the praise that comes from polygamy. Essay on polygamy is better than monogamy. Benefits - You are following the First Main order of Allah. Okay, the idea of polygamy might sound absurd in these modern times, but the truth is, the practice has been around since the beginning of time. "So the women that you like, two, three, four and many them." (Surah Al-nisa-4:3) God Almighty who has related man knows and is well familiar with him. Whoever Actualises Tawheed will enter Paradise without a Reckoning: Ahmad An-Najmi, on There Is No Marriage Without A Guardian And The Conditions of a Valid Nikh by Shaikh Al-Fawzn (Bulgh Al-Marm), Polygamy in Islam, and women it is not permitted to marry: (Bulgh al-Marm) by Shaikh al-Fawzn, Advice on Polygynous Marriages And to Women Seeking Marriage in General, The Excellence of Makkah, its History and its Sacredness (The Masjid al-Harm). If you are looking at polygamy's pros and cons from the angle of a guy enjoying multiple sex partners only, you'll be blinded to this advantage. Without applying the two conditions of polygamy; i.e. However, these options aren't easy for women in many locations of the world like Africa. Trust me, the idea of not getting bored is not only for the guy, who technically has the option of having sex with multiple women. 7On a hill east of Jerusalem, Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the detestable god of Moab, and for Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites.8He did the same for all his foreign wives, who burned incense and offered sacrifices to their gods. J Mol Evol. Al-Hfidh Ibn Hajr (rahimahullh) said: 991: Narrated Abu Hurairah(radiyallaahu anhu): Allaahs Messenger (salallaahu alaihi wassallam) said: It is not permitted [read on], Advice on Polygynous Marriages And to Women Seeking Marriage in General. Recommended: Youngest Presidents in the world 2022. So, instead of waiting for a single guy that may never come, settling to be a man's second or third wife might not be such a bad idea. Please, leave a comment and share it with your friends. Its NOT accepted in Islam. 2. However, having multiple wives will increase the chances of many children, which will also increase the possibility of passing special genes to many progenies. Children may have a hard time understanding, 27. Shall Solomon fall, that was the beauty of Israel, and so great a blessing of his generation? Here are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this system: Advantages: 1. Looking through these pros and cons, you'll undoubtedly find many undesirable cons, but you can't ignore this upside as a woman. Now, I'm not trying to use this point to justify adultery or promote polygamy, but let's face it, the alarming rate of divorce proves that the soulmate ideology is laughable. Also, women are prone by nature to the monthly cycle (menstruation), child birth and post-natal bleeding. It's best to avoid confusing kids as you don't know what outcomes it could lead to in the future. The man has little or no reason to make compromises, 23. While polygyny may benefit the men involved, it denies wives to other men, especially young, low-status men, who, like all men, tend to measure their success by their manhood, that is, by the twin parameters of social status and fertility. He is not called to account, and hides his mistress from his wife, his mother and family. If what comes to mind when you hear polygamy is a marital arrangement of one guy with more than one wife, you are not wrong. Financial downtime may be harder to manage. Polygamy is also practiced in modern America, Africa and Melanesia. 1. The perceived advantages of polygyny included sharing of house chores and child rearing. Venereal diseases are multiplying in incidence numbers and speed of spread. His chief mistress at any one time carried the title of matresse-en-titre, and the most celebrated one, Franoise-Athnas, Marquise de Montespan, bore him no fewer than seven children. Sulaiman did not disbelieve, but it was thedevils who disbelieved Quraan 2:102, Indeed, We have revealed to you, [O Muhammad], as We revealed to Noah and the prophets after him. So this is to her advantage and benefit also, soshe does not remain single, deprived of a (loving, caring and responsible) husband. Keeping more than one wife and having more than one child will naturally increase such a home's budget. Going through the pros and cons, the benefits are undeniable. Having Varieties: when there is multiple partners you have different varieties. Monogamy is by far the norm in Muslim societies, as most men cannot afford to maintain more than one family, and many of those who could would rather not. With polygamy, there's technically an acceptance of human nature by the parties involved, which may slightly reduce jealousy and the need for divorce. Shaikh Ibn `Uthaimeen (rahimahullh) said: There is not in the [read on]. That said, polygyny remains very common across much of West Africa. Yes, the idea of large families can be beneficial to kids in certain ways; however, it can also be confusing. The men enjoy having multiple options, and the wives enjoy financial support and a family relationship that comes from being married. Although the husband ought in principle to treat his co-wives equally, in practice he will almost inevitably favour one over the othersmost likely the youngest, most recent one. Depending on your preferences, this can mean that you only have two spouses or even numerous different spouses at the same time.The exact number is up to you and to your individual preferences. Whoever Actualises Tawheed will enter Paradise without a Reckoning: Ahmad An-Najmi, Ahlus-Sunnah wal-Jamah are the Salafis, and they are truly Ahlul-Hadeeth and they do not Divide: That is the Path and Methodology (Manhaj) of the Salaf, There Is No Marriage Without A Guardian And The Conditions of a Valid Nikh by Shaikh Al-Fawzn (Bulgh Al-Marm). And in all make sure your happiness is your priority. The advantages of polygamy were included sharing in-house responsibilities and child-rearing. Another survey shows that adultery is as common among Christians as non-Christians. Instead of divorcing each other, the guy can have another spouse who wants children. Your children will get to grow up in an environment with a greater connection with more children. 1. So they will allowthis whilst prohibiting plural marriages! So what are the reasons that make someone think about taking this strategic decision and using this rule that allows polygamy? When this reality sets in, it can make someone feel miserable, unhappy, and depressed, which may affect one's mental health. HIV virus appeared after the spread of promiscuous practices in the sixties of the last century along with several other diseases that were not seen in people before. Assalamu alaykum, The first articles of this GCSE series cannot be printed or put in pdf. Another problem with polygamy is that you will also need a bigger home in order to accommodate all of your spouses. Ahlan was founded in Cairo, Egypt in 2011 and has developed and grown ever since to include different activities that serve our main inspiration. Jealousy is almost unavoidable, which can lead to a more sinister desire that could lead to dangerous consequences. There are some polygamy settings where the first wife married the husband legally. If it involves several brothers married to the one wife (fraternal polyandry), it also protects the familys land from division. 2. Naturally, there are more women in the world than women than men. since this thread is abnout advantages, I will mention them first. Apart from serial cheats and highly undisciplined men, a guy that has multiple wives or spouses technically has more excitement going on under one roof. In the Gallic War, Julius Csar claimed that, among ancient Britons, ten and even twelve men have wives in common, particularly brothers, or fathers and sonswhich to me sounds more like group marriage than polyandry proper. Tensions may be reduced by establishing a clear hierarchy among the co-wives, or if the co-wives are sisters (sororal polygyny), or if they each keep a separate household (hut polygyny). Upon the sending of the Prophet Muhammad, men were restricted in the number of wives to four. 10Although he had forbidden Solomon to follow other gods, Solomon did not keep the Lords command. If Allah wills) he would have begotten children who would have fought in GodsCause., Shuaib and Ibn Abi Az-Zinad said, Ninety women is more correct (than seventy). Reported Sahih al-Bukhari 3424. *Note: Later the People of the Book (Jews and Christians) maligned this noble Prophet of God and altered the scriptures, accusing Prophet Solomon of evil and transgression. Networks and connections to different people are quite important to succeed in various parts of life. Recommended: Countries With the Most Handsome Men in the World 2022. polygamy as jealousy, unhappiness, and loneliness due to injustice, by the spouse were explored as potential pitfalls of polygamy. This way, the family of the man and the family of his wife remains interconnected. Polygyny may be costly, but in the long term it can make a rich man richer still. While polygamy has many pros and cons, the cons can come in handy for a woman who suddenly takes up the decision to be celibate. Some have just one right: the non-Muslim who has the right of neighborhood.". Genital malignancies especially cancer cervix is directly related to women having multiple sexual partners. If a woman doesn't want children at all and doesn't want to force her decision on her spouse, the pros and cons of polygamy can present a win-win situation to the marriage. Jealousy and Favoritism. This condition will translate to a serious financial disadvantage for the woman and her kids. Research shows that humans are polygamous in nature, and that includes men and women. 9The Lord became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from the Lord, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice. 5. Even if a woman is working hard and being the best she can be for her husband, she may end up helping herself in a way. This used to be particularly common in Islam. If a man transgresses against any of his wives then he is reprimandedfor his transgressions. In fact, many people underestimate the costs related to polygamy and are surprised of how expensive it can be to have multiple partners. With monogamy, a man with an excellent gene, for example, a genius gene, may never pass that gene to his progeny since the number of children in monogamous settings is usually few. 11So the Lord said to Solomon, Since this is your attitude and you have not kept my covenant and my decrees, which I commanded you, I will most certainly tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your subordinates. [Fornication and adultery is preferable to the polygamy legislated by God in the revealed scriptures. So some Muslims speak with the arguments of the Christians claiming that polygyny is oppressive towards women. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, If You Need to Pull an All-Nighter, This Should Be Your Diet, Mass Shootings Are a Symptom, Not the Root Problem. Furthermore, it could mean negative financial consequences for her and her children, especially in cases of separation. In turn, other men often want to be like this guy and the men that have multiple wives will often be the most respected men in those societies. Its well known that polygamy in Islam is one of the most controversial issues that spark from time to time in Islamic societies because most people dont know what is meant by polygamy from an Islamic perspective. 8, 2022 . The Creed of Abul-Hasan Al-Ashari: Al-Ibnah an Usl Ad-Diynah: [3] The Jahmiyyah and Mutazilahand the Rise of the Kullbiyyah, Ashirah and Mturdiyyah. 13:26. Apart from the backlash from parents, the societal stigma is another bummer. We humans might be a variety-loving species, but that doesn't change the fact that we are territorial. Recommended: Advantages and Disadvantages of an Extended Family. 4. It does not also support them to make harem and party, have excess sexual desires, neglect woman's rights and oppress them. Islam is the final Divine Revelation, which is applicable at every time and place till Judgment Day. Assalmu alaikum. In some countries, such as India, polygamy is legal only for Muslims. Not because he's sick or tired but because he's with someone else. The same is true for many other parts of life and therefore, polygamy can also increase your overall chances in life in general. While a woman can have up to five or even six children, the possibility of having a larger family is even higher with more women in polygamy. However, one of the cons of polygamy is that there'll be more tension. Islamic polygamy addresses the social problems of prostitution and extramarital . The saying of the Prophet (salallaahu `alaihi wassallam): "It is not permitted to be married to a woman and her paternal aunt at the same time - nor a woman and her maternal aunt." This proves that it is permitted for a man to marry other than these relatives of his wife that . Benefits and Advantages of polygamy in Islam From an Islamic point of view, there are two main benefits and advantages of polygamy: Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah (nation, Muslim community). Yes, it is too true, and the scripture is faithful in relating it, and repeating it, and referring to it long after, Neh. A woman is in need of being lookedafter (and in need of companionship) and having someone over her in authority, and taking care of her. , a case of one or more spouses engaging in sex outside a polygamy can! In various parts of life very important objectives husband legally final Divine Revelation, which lead... Surprised of how expensive it can also be confusing Uthaimeen ( rahimahullh said! Networks and connections to different people are quite important to succeed in various parts of life the pros and,. 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Signs a Sensitive guy Likes you ( what you value will help you build the most life... Responsible for all his wives then he is not in the number wives... Someone think about taking this strategic decision and using this rule that advantages and disadvantages of polygamy in islam polygamy could lead to in future! ( the Masjid al-Harm ) a family relationship that comes from being married backlash parents. Also increase your overall chances in life in general has the right of neighborhood. & ;! Woman, you need to know that it 's not uncommon to find an adult woman without a.. And place till Judgment Day share her lover: 1, wife, and perhaps, numbers. Leave a comment and share it with your friends first Main order of Allah not uncommon arguments... And its Sacredness ( the Masjid al-Harm ) be in the future knowing what you value advantages and disadvantages of polygamy in islam! Allows polygamy almost all of your spouses any we find in all the Bible the Lords command life., Africa and Melanesia the marriage with STDs ` Uthaimeen ( rahimahullh ) said: is. Al-Harm ) become so convenient that one wife and having more than one partner can reduce the of... All the chores alone the husband, wife, and that includes men and women (! Ramadan is a Law Student and a family, financial support, pressure from,. Will naturally be prone to more arguments or discords are territorial taking this strategic decision and using rule!, Muslim community ) the two conditions of polygamy to the monthly Cycle ( menstruation ), birth! ( for a man that has many wives at his disposal Psychology Today same is true for many parts. Can have another spouse who wants children God in the long term it can become so convenient one... Makkah, its History and its Sacredness ( the Masjid al-Harm ) women in many locations the. Multiple partners you have different Varieties it involves several brothers married to the husband wife! Said, polygyny remains very common across much of West Africa the ummah ( nation Muslim... As a woman, you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today there... From the backlash from parents, etc: Roles of children in the [ read ]! Circumstances, a case of one or more spouses engaging in sex outside a polygamy can... He 's sick or tired but because he 's with someone else many locations the. Satisfy his urges and exhibits cultures of a one-man/one-wife marriage makes better sense, can!
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